I Need You to Love Me

I was listening to the song “I Need You to Love Me,” by BarlowGirl on Air 1 today. The thing I hate about songs like that is that a young girl who doesn’t know that it is about Jesus would totally get the wrong message. It sounds like the cry of a woman desperate for a man’s love. “I don’t deserve you, but I need you to love me.” Yikes! Can you say “dysfunction”?

That got me thinking about how we as women are always turning to men to validate us and make us feel worthy. As men though, as humans, they are never able to fulfill us. They are not perfect. They will screw up, they will hurt us. Some more than others, but even a great guy is still an imperfect human being who will make mistakes that will break our hearts. As long as we look to them to fill us, we will never become full.

I did a book group with some other women on the book, Captivating, by John and Stasi Eldredge. That book is a real eye-opener to the issues we face as women trying to feel, well, captivating.

There is only One who can ever make us feel worthy. As the song says, He’s “a God who has all things and still [He] want[s] me.” Think about that for a minute. The God that created the heavens and the earth cares so much about you. He wants you. He loves you.

Even more amazing is that He knows everything you have ever done. Even the things that you are so ashamed of that you have never told anyone else. And He still loves you.

There is no man that will ever be able to give you that kind of love.

My husband is a great man, but there are times when he is emotionally distant. That can be so hurtful. Now that I understand that I can always turn to Jesus in times like that, I no longer experience the hurt that I once did when I feel like my husband is not there for me in the way I want him to be.

I was not created to be filled by him. I was created to be filled by Him.